1
00:00:14,815 --> 00:00:17,718
[woman reading text]

2
00:00:17,751 --> 00:00:18,819
"As you can see,

3
00:00:18,852 --> 00:00:23,724
"I have decided to redesign
the homepage...again!

4
00:00:23,757 --> 00:00:27,795
"As the greatest detective
in the universe would say;

5
00:00:27,828 --> 00:00:30,331
"you'll thank me later.

6
00:00:30,364 --> 00:00:34,068
Love to all,
Marci."

7
00:00:45,113 --> 00:00:47,581
Bye-bye.

8
00:00:49,850 --> 00:00:52,153
That's better.

9
00:00:52,186 --> 00:00:57,091
Oh, Brian! Brian!

10
00:00:57,125 --> 00:00:58,859
Victory is mine!

11
00:00:58,892 --> 00:01:01,729
Oh, man!
Thought I had you.

12
00:01:01,762 --> 00:01:03,397
You almost did.

13
00:01:03,431 --> 00:01:05,833
Debbie?

14
00:01:05,866 --> 00:01:07,835
Debbie, honey.

15
00:01:07,868 --> 00:01:11,305
Brian's here.
We're gonna watch the Giants.

16
00:01:11,339 --> 00:01:12,540
Maybe she went out.

17
00:01:12,573 --> 00:01:13,774
No. Her car's still here.

18
00:01:13,807 --> 00:01:15,343
Debbie?

19
00:01:15,376 --> 00:01:17,378
Oh, my God!

20
00:01:17,411 --> 00:01:18,812
Debbie!

21
00:01:18,846 --> 00:01:21,249
Debbie!

22
00:01:21,282 --> 00:01:24,118
Brian, call 9-1-1!

23
00:01:24,152 --> 00:01:25,753
[crying]
Oh, baby!

24
00:01:34,728 --> 00:01:36,364
Are you Marci Maven?

25
00:01:36,397 --> 00:01:37,765
Do you own a dog named
Otto?

26
00:01:37,798 --> 00:01:39,467
You're damn right
she does.

27
00:01:39,500 --> 00:01:41,869
That beast of yours
killed my wife!

28
00:01:41,902 --> 00:01:42,836
I warned you
about him!

29
00:01:42,870 --> 00:01:44,672
Mr. Ringel, please.
We'll take care of this.

30
00:01:44,705 --> 00:01:46,707
What's going on?

31
00:01:46,740 --> 00:01:47,908
There was an attack
earlier today

32
00:01:47,941 --> 00:01:49,277
across the street.

33
00:01:49,310 --> 00:01:53,281
Oh, today?
No, that wasn't Otto.

34
00:01:53,314 --> 00:01:54,715
We're gonna have
to take him in, ma'am.

35
00:01:54,748 --> 00:01:57,117
Where's the dog?

36
00:02:09,663 --> 00:02:12,500
Yeah, I really don't think
it was him.

37
00:02:18,906 --> 00:02:21,842
[Randy Newman ragtime theme]

38
00:02:21,875 --> 00:02:24,212
* It's a jungle out there

39
00:02:24,245 --> 00:02:28,716
* Disorder and confusion
everywhere *

40
00:02:28,749 --> 00:02:30,818
* No one seems to care

41
00:02:30,851 --> 00:02:31,885
* Well, I do

42
00:02:31,919 --> 00:02:34,855
* Hey, who's in charge here?

43
00:02:34,888 --> 00:02:38,759
* It's a jungle out there

44
00:02:38,792 --> 00:02:41,795
* Poison in the very air
we breathe *

45
00:02:41,829 --> 00:02:43,964
* You know what's in
the water that you drink? *

46
00:02:43,997 --> 00:02:48,902
* Well, I do,
and it's a-ma-zing *

47
00:02:48,936 --> 00:02:51,839
* People think I'm crazy
'cause I worry all the time *

48
00:02:51,872 --> 00:02:55,343
* If you paid attention,
you'd be worried too *

49
00:02:55,376 --> 00:02:59,747
* You'd better pay attention
or this world we love so much *

50
00:02:59,780 --> 00:03:03,451
* Might just kill you

51
00:03:03,484 --> 00:03:05,786
* I could be wrong now

52
00:03:05,819 --> 00:03:07,755
* But I don't think so

53
00:03:07,788 --> 00:03:10,291
* 'Cause it's
a jungle out there *

54
00:03:10,324 --> 00:03:13,727
* It's a jungle
out there *

55
00:03:17,998 --> 00:03:20,468
(Monk)
Bachelor Auction? What?

56
00:03:20,501 --> 00:03:21,635
Yeah, people bid for you.

57
00:03:21,669 --> 00:03:23,237
It's fun.
It's for charity.

58
00:03:23,271 --> 00:03:24,338
[heavy sigh]

59
00:03:24,372 --> 00:03:25,439
Now this side's crooked.

60
00:03:25,473 --> 00:03:26,574
When you're up
for reinstatement,

61
00:03:26,607 --> 00:03:27,775
it'll look good
on your record.

62
00:03:27,808 --> 00:03:29,477
Plus,
it's for a good cause.

63
00:03:29,510 --> 00:03:30,578
Police widows.

64
00:03:30,611 --> 00:03:32,646
It's always the widows.

65
00:03:32,680 --> 00:03:36,717
Why can't they just move on,
you know?

66
00:03:36,750 --> 00:03:38,919
Everybody's doing it.
The captain's doing it.

67
00:03:38,952 --> 00:03:40,754
Don't you wanna be
a team player?
No.

68
00:03:40,788 --> 00:03:44,024
Don't you want to appear
to be a team player?
Sure.

69
00:03:44,057 --> 00:03:45,826
All right.
How about this?

70
00:03:45,859 --> 00:03:47,461
You give me $600.

71
00:03:47,495 --> 00:03:49,330
When somebody bids on you,
I'll bid against them.

72
00:03:49,363 --> 00:03:50,664
I'll outbid them.

73
00:03:50,698 --> 00:03:53,601
You'll outbid them?
That's a good plan.

74
00:03:53,634 --> 00:03:55,869
That's a great plan.

75
00:03:55,903 --> 00:03:58,306
How do I
get my money back?

76
00:03:58,339 --> 00:03:59,707
No, you don't.
It goes to charity.

77
00:03:59,740 --> 00:04:00,841
Let's keep thinking.

78
00:04:00,874 --> 00:04:02,510
[doorbell rings]

79
00:04:08,749 --> 00:04:12,520
[doorbell rings
insistently]

80
00:04:15,789 --> 00:04:17,491
Oh, God!

81
00:04:17,525 --> 00:04:19,560
[loud whisper]
My God! Natalie!

82
00:04:22,330 --> 00:04:25,299
It's that girl,
that Marci Maven,

83
00:04:25,333 --> 00:04:27,401
my crazy fan.

84
00:04:34,375 --> 00:04:35,443
Oh, hey, Marci.

85
00:04:35,476 --> 00:04:37,411
Oh, Natalie, hello.

86
00:04:37,445 --> 00:04:38,946
I need to speak
with Adrian.

87
00:04:38,979 --> 00:04:40,314
Sorry.
You just missed him.

88
00:04:40,348 --> 00:04:42,049
He's, um...

89
00:04:42,082 --> 00:04:43,317
uh...

90
00:04:43,351 --> 00:04:44,985
he's getting his hair cut.

91
00:04:46,053 --> 00:04:48,456
I know he's here.

92
00:04:48,489 --> 00:04:51,459
Okay, he left at 8:00.
He came back 35 minutes later.

93
00:04:51,492 --> 00:04:53,327
And besides,
he only gets his hair cut

94
00:04:53,361 --> 00:04:55,363
every first and third Tuesday
of every month.

95
00:04:56,930 --> 00:05:00,100
He's behind the door.
I can smell his shampoo.

96
00:05:00,133 --> 00:05:01,869
Pantene for dry hair.

97
00:05:01,902 --> 00:05:03,437
[sniffing]

98
00:05:03,471 --> 00:05:05,639
Listen, I really need
to speak with him.

99
00:05:05,673 --> 00:05:06,807
It's important.
I'm in trouble!

100
00:05:06,840 --> 00:05:08,409
Yeah, that's what you said
last year, Marci.

101
00:05:08,442 --> 00:05:10,411
You said it was a matter
of life or death.

102
00:05:10,444 --> 00:05:12,580
But when he got in the car,
you locked the door

103
00:05:12,613 --> 00:05:14,348
and tried to drive him
to Corpus Christi.

104
00:05:14,382 --> 00:05:15,215
It was Thanksgiving!

105
00:05:15,248 --> 00:05:17,451
What does that have to do
with anything?

106
00:05:17,485 --> 00:05:18,986
Listen.
It's different this time.

107
00:05:19,019 --> 00:05:20,554
My neighbor got killed!

108
00:05:20,588 --> 00:05:23,357
They're blaming my dog.
Somebody's framing my dog!

109
00:05:23,391 --> 00:05:24,492
Okay, Marci,
then call the police.

110
00:05:24,525 --> 00:05:26,427
I did.
They don't believe me.

111
00:05:26,460 --> 00:05:27,761
Okay, Marci, Marci!
Sorry, can't help you.

112
00:05:27,795 --> 00:05:29,430
Oh!

113
00:05:31,164 --> 00:05:34,502
Is she gone?
Yeah.

114
00:05:38,639 --> 00:05:39,707
Oh!
Hey, Adrian.

115
00:05:39,740 --> 00:05:42,510
It's me, Marci Maven.

116
00:05:42,543 --> 00:05:44,845
Next up,
Captain Leland Stottlemeyer.

117
00:05:44,878 --> 00:05:48,649
Who wants to take
this handsome stud home, huh?

118
00:05:48,682 --> 00:05:51,151
Captain Stottlemeyer
plays guitar

119
00:05:51,184 --> 00:05:54,488
and claims to be quite handy
around the house.

120
00:05:54,522 --> 00:05:55,923
Do I hear $300?

121
00:05:55,956 --> 00:05:57,625
$300!

122
00:05:57,658 --> 00:06:02,062
Okay. Okay, here is $600.

123
00:06:02,095 --> 00:06:04,698
But don't spend it all
if you don't have to.

124
00:06:04,732 --> 00:06:06,033
Do I hear $400?

125
00:06:06,066 --> 00:06:07,435
$400.

126
00:06:07,468 --> 00:06:09,002
$400 going once--

127
00:06:09,036 --> 00:06:11,472
$2,000!

128
00:06:11,505 --> 00:06:13,441
I have $2,000.

129
00:06:13,474 --> 00:06:15,543
Going once, going twice,

130
00:06:15,576 --> 00:06:17,811
sold to that
very generous woman

131
00:06:17,845 --> 00:06:19,146
in the leopard shirt.

132
00:06:19,179 --> 00:06:21,515
What are you doing?

133
00:06:21,549 --> 00:06:24,151
I am buying six hours
with my man.

134
00:06:24,184 --> 00:06:25,986
He hasn't left the office
in two weeks.

135
00:06:26,019 --> 00:06:27,755
That's a lot of money.
Damn right.

136
00:06:27,788 --> 00:06:29,490
So you had better be
worth it.

137
00:06:29,523 --> 00:06:33,561
Ladies, say hello
to Randy Disher.

138
00:06:33,594 --> 00:06:39,199
Born in San Diego,
now a homicide detective.
[disco music plays]

139
00:06:39,232 --> 00:06:42,636
Enjoys home-cooked meals
and long walks on the beach.

140
00:06:42,670 --> 00:06:43,971
Should I take this off?

141
00:06:44,004 --> 00:06:46,173
Um, no, that's--
Okay!

142
00:06:46,206 --> 00:06:48,208
[cheering]

143
00:06:48,241 --> 00:06:50,210
Do I hear $300?

144
00:06:50,243 --> 00:06:51,211
$300!

145
00:06:51,244 --> 00:06:54,014
$300.
How about $350?
$350!

146
00:06:54,047 --> 00:06:55,148
$400.
$400!

147
00:06:55,182 --> 00:06:56,950
$450!
$400? $450!

148
00:06:56,984 --> 00:06:58,185
[cheering]

149
00:06:58,218 --> 00:06:59,186
$650!

150
00:06:59,219 --> 00:07:00,888
Come on, $750.
$800!

151
00:07:00,921 --> 00:07:02,590
$850.

152
00:07:02,623 --> 00:07:04,458
$850!

153
00:07:04,492 --> 00:07:05,493
Going once,

154
00:07:05,526 --> 00:07:07,160
going twice--

155
00:07:07,194 --> 00:07:09,497
Wrap this boy up.
He's sold.

156
00:07:09,530 --> 00:07:12,199
All right!

157
00:07:12,232 --> 00:07:13,233
Thank you.

158
00:07:13,266 --> 00:07:15,603
Hi, I'm Cameron Meyer.

159
00:07:15,636 --> 00:07:16,604
Randy Disher.

160
00:07:16,637 --> 00:07:18,806
Well, Ms. Meyer.

161
00:07:18,839 --> 00:07:21,241
I guess you're the boss.

162
00:07:21,274 --> 00:07:23,143
What'd you have in mind?

163
00:07:23,176 --> 00:07:26,213
This is Sam.

164
00:07:26,246 --> 00:07:27,815
He wants
to be a policeman.

165
00:07:27,848 --> 00:07:29,717
I thought
I could just drop him off

166
00:07:29,750 --> 00:07:31,251
and he could follow you
around.

167
00:07:31,284 --> 00:07:32,586
Yeah!

168
00:07:32,620 --> 00:07:33,987
Yeah, sure.
That'd be, uh--

169
00:07:34,021 --> 00:07:35,188
That'd be great.

170
00:07:35,222 --> 00:07:37,558
This is gonna be
a lotta fun, huh?

171
00:07:37,591 --> 00:07:40,794
Next on our program

172
00:07:40,828 --> 00:07:42,630
is Mr. Adrian Monk.

173
00:07:44,832 --> 00:07:46,767
Mr. Monk

174
00:07:46,800 --> 00:07:49,603
is a former
homicide detective

175
00:07:49,637 --> 00:07:52,606
now working
as a private consultant.

176
00:07:52,640 --> 00:07:56,510
He has worked
on many famous cases.

177
00:07:56,544 --> 00:07:57,611
Let's start the bidding

178
00:07:57,645 --> 00:07:58,979
at $200.

179
00:07:59,012 --> 00:08:01,549
Do I hear $200?

180
00:08:08,321 --> 00:08:13,293
Ladies,
this is a world-class detective.

181
00:08:13,326 --> 00:08:14,995
Maybe you have a husband

182
00:08:15,028 --> 00:08:18,265
or a boyfriend
who needs following.

183
00:08:20,668 --> 00:08:23,236
Maybe you can't find
your car keys.

184
00:08:23,270 --> 00:08:24,905
$200.

185
00:08:27,007 --> 00:08:29,142
I have an opening bid
of $200.
$250!

186
00:08:29,176 --> 00:08:31,311
I have $250.
Do I hear $300?

187
00:08:31,344 --> 00:08:32,312
$300.

188
00:08:32,345 --> 00:08:33,180
$300.

189
00:08:33,213 --> 00:08:34,782
$350!
$350.

190
00:08:34,815 --> 00:08:35,949
$400?

191
00:08:35,983 --> 00:08:38,018
Come on, ladies!

192
00:08:38,051 --> 00:08:39,953
$600!

193
00:08:39,987 --> 00:08:41,955
We have $600.

194
00:08:41,989 --> 00:08:43,256
$600 and, uh--

195
00:08:43,290 --> 00:08:44,658
Hold on, hold on!

196
00:08:44,692 --> 00:08:49,329
Uh...$34.17.

197
00:08:49,362 --> 00:08:52,299
$800.

198
00:08:52,332 --> 00:08:53,266
$800!

199
00:08:53,300 --> 00:08:57,037
Do I hear $850?

200
00:08:59,372 --> 00:09:00,340
$800 going once--

201
00:09:00,373 --> 00:09:01,975
$5,000!

202
00:09:02,009 --> 00:09:05,278
Mr. Monk, you cannot bid
on yourself.

203
00:09:05,312 --> 00:09:08,181
$800 going twice--
Wait, stop!
No.

204
00:09:08,215 --> 00:09:10,183
No, no, no. Okay.

205
00:09:10,217 --> 00:09:13,153
Somebody?

206
00:09:13,186 --> 00:09:15,589
I'll do anything.
I'll do anything.

207
00:09:17,625 --> 00:09:20,293
Look.

208
00:09:22,696 --> 00:09:25,899
Beefcake.

209
00:09:28,235 --> 00:09:30,037
[weakly]
Beefcake.

210
00:09:31,739 --> 00:09:34,842
Please.
There was a restraining order.

211
00:09:34,875 --> 00:09:36,576
Sold...

212
00:09:38,211 --> 00:09:39,312
to the very determined,

213
00:09:39,346 --> 00:09:41,348
very mysterious girl
in the green.

214
00:09:41,381 --> 00:09:43,050
Okay.

215
00:09:43,083 --> 00:09:45,252
Nice going.
All righty.

216
00:09:45,285 --> 00:09:47,287
Next. Okay.

217
00:09:53,060 --> 00:09:56,163
Hello!
Right on time, of course.

218
00:09:57,998 --> 00:10:00,668
It's okay.
I'm right here.

219
00:10:00,701 --> 00:10:02,135
Come in.
Come in, come in.

220
00:10:02,169 --> 00:10:03,637
No.

221
00:10:03,671 --> 00:10:05,105
You can pick him up
at 6:00.

222
00:10:05,138 --> 00:10:07,407
No, no.
She's with me.

223
00:10:07,440 --> 00:10:09,777
I can't do this alone.

224
00:10:09,810 --> 00:10:13,246
Well, Adrian, I--
I bid on you.

225
00:10:13,280 --> 00:10:16,750
I mean, I...
don't think we need a chaperone.

226
00:10:16,784 --> 00:10:18,085
6:00 would be great.

227
00:10:18,118 --> 00:10:21,621
Yeah, she's with me.
I can't do this alone.

228
00:10:23,691 --> 00:10:24,792
Okay, fine.
Good.

229
00:10:24,825 --> 00:10:25,926
The more the merrier.

230
00:10:25,959 --> 00:10:29,229
I just--
I hope I made enough cookies.

231
00:10:29,262 --> 00:10:32,032
Oh, I painted this for you

232
00:10:32,065 --> 00:10:33,934
two years ago
for your birthday,

233
00:10:33,967 --> 00:10:37,037
but Judge Franklin wouldn't
let me give it to you

234
00:10:37,070 --> 00:10:38,271
because
of the restraining order.

235
00:10:38,305 --> 00:10:40,974
You know,
50 yards away and...

236
00:10:41,008 --> 00:10:42,976
no contact.

237
00:10:43,010 --> 00:10:44,444
Jerk.

238
00:10:44,477 --> 00:10:47,114
Oh, please,
make yourselves at home.

239
00:10:47,147 --> 00:10:48,448
Sit down.

240
00:10:48,481 --> 00:10:51,018
I'm sorry I'm babbling.
I'm nervous, you know?

241
00:10:51,051 --> 00:10:53,721
I've just been imagining this
for so long, you know?

242
00:10:53,754 --> 00:10:54,722
You, Adrian Monk.

243
00:10:54,755 --> 00:10:57,224
You're really here.

244
00:10:59,092 --> 00:11:00,193
Oh! So rude.

245
00:11:00,227 --> 00:11:03,130
Here we go.

246
00:11:03,163 --> 00:11:06,734
Summit Creek Water.
It's his favorite.

247
00:11:06,767 --> 00:11:08,001
I know.

248
00:11:08,035 --> 00:11:09,169
Well, do you know

249
00:11:09,202 --> 00:11:10,370
what his favorite drink was
last year?

250
00:11:10,403 --> 00:11:12,005
I do!

251
00:11:12,039 --> 00:11:14,007
Sierra Springs.

252
00:11:14,041 --> 00:11:17,144
Uh...ten ice cubes,
of course.

253
00:11:17,177 --> 00:11:19,079
And...

254
00:11:22,182 --> 00:11:24,184
some cookies,
fresh from the oven.

255
00:11:25,385 --> 00:11:26,820
They're square.

256
00:11:26,854 --> 00:11:30,090
I knew
you would appreciate that.

257
00:11:30,123 --> 00:11:31,291
Yeah,
I've been baking all day...

258
00:11:31,324 --> 00:11:32,325
and cleaning!

259
00:11:32,359 --> 00:11:35,328
I wanted everything
to be perfect.

260
00:11:35,362 --> 00:11:37,865
Marci...

261
00:11:37,898 --> 00:11:39,166
is this my glass?

262
00:11:39,199 --> 00:11:43,236
Not anymore.
You threw it out, remember?

263
00:11:43,270 --> 00:11:46,239
And yes, this is your rug.
And yes, that's your lamp.

264
00:11:46,273 --> 00:11:49,076
And yes,
these are your pants.

265
00:11:49,109 --> 00:11:50,844
Don't worry.

266
00:11:50,878 --> 00:11:53,346
Not crazy, just a fan.

267
00:11:53,380 --> 00:11:57,250
You are amazing.
But you know that, don't you?

268
00:11:59,086 --> 00:12:01,288
His pants?

269
00:12:01,321 --> 00:12:02,823
You know what I love?

270
00:12:02,856 --> 00:12:04,391
I love
how you solve cases.

271
00:12:04,424 --> 00:12:07,394
The way you move around
and you look at things.

272
00:12:07,427 --> 00:12:10,297
And you see things
no one else sees.

273
00:12:10,330 --> 00:12:12,199
I love that.

274
00:12:12,232 --> 00:12:15,335
I mean, you really are
a great artist.

275
00:12:15,368 --> 00:12:19,339
Well, a great artist--
I don't know about that.

276
00:12:22,275 --> 00:12:24,044
Is there a problem?

277
00:12:24,077 --> 00:12:27,881
No, no, no.
He's a great artist.

278
00:12:27,915 --> 00:12:30,083
That's why
I went to the auction.

279
00:12:30,117 --> 00:12:31,218
Because I really am
in trouble.

280
00:12:31,251 --> 00:12:33,420
I need your help,
you know?

281
00:12:33,453 --> 00:12:37,057
So do you wanna talk
about the case now

282
00:12:37,090 --> 00:12:39,226
or should we just relax
for a little while?

283
00:12:39,259 --> 00:12:42,362
What are the choices again?

284
00:12:42,395 --> 00:12:44,164
Relax or talk
about the case.

285
00:12:44,197 --> 00:12:47,234
Yeah, relax!
Let's just relax.

286
00:12:47,267 --> 00:12:49,402
Plenty of time.

287
00:12:49,436 --> 00:12:52,105
Five hours and 52 minutes.

288
00:12:55,909 --> 00:12:57,610
(Natalie, whispering)
Mr. Monk!

289
00:13:01,481 --> 00:13:03,616
Excuse me.

290
00:13:07,487 --> 00:13:09,990
[whispering]
Oh, my God.

291
00:13:11,258 --> 00:13:12,525
Oh, my God.

292
00:13:18,131 --> 00:13:21,068
(Marci)
This is my favorite.
It's from last summer.

293
00:13:21,101 --> 00:13:23,136
See, what I do is I read
the articles about you

294
00:13:23,170 --> 00:13:26,139
and then I make dioramas
of the various cases.

295
00:13:26,173 --> 00:13:29,276
This one is "Mr. Monk
and the Three Pies."

296
00:13:31,178 --> 00:13:32,479
What?!

297
00:13:32,512 --> 00:13:34,181
When you went to see
your brother.

298
00:13:34,214 --> 00:13:36,884
That's what I call it.

299
00:13:36,917 --> 00:13:39,286
Is that...me?

300
00:13:42,322 --> 00:13:45,192
Adrian,
should we call the captain?

301
00:13:45,225 --> 00:13:47,160
[as Monk]
Not yet, Marci.

302
00:13:47,194 --> 00:13:49,496
We need
to gather more evidence.

303
00:13:49,529 --> 00:13:52,565
Natalie, get the car.

304
00:13:52,599 --> 00:13:54,067
On my way, Mr. Monk.

305
00:13:54,101 --> 00:13:55,102
Is that me?

306
00:13:57,137 --> 00:13:58,271
It's a troll doll.

307
00:13:58,305 --> 00:14:00,107
Huh.

308
00:14:00,140 --> 00:14:01,274
Marci.

309
00:14:01,308 --> 00:14:03,276
I can't imagine life
without you.

310
00:14:03,310 --> 00:14:04,878
Oh!

311
00:14:04,912 --> 00:14:07,647
[whispering]
Adrian, I've waited so long--

312
00:14:07,680 --> 00:14:08,982
Mar--
Marci!

313
00:14:09,016 --> 00:14:10,083
Hmm?

314
00:14:10,117 --> 00:14:12,319
Marci,
are you a musician?

315
00:14:12,352 --> 00:14:14,888
[laughing]

316
00:14:14,922 --> 00:14:17,190
You know I am!

317
00:14:17,224 --> 00:14:20,460
I've only sent you
all my demos.

318
00:14:20,493 --> 00:14:24,064
I'm working on a song.
Here.

319
00:14:24,097 --> 00:14:26,233
* There's a man in California

320
00:14:26,266 --> 00:14:28,601
* If you're ever in a funk

321
00:14:32,072 --> 00:14:35,008
* He may not be
F. Murray Abraham *

322
00:14:35,042 --> 00:14:37,310
* But I think he's a hunk

323
00:14:39,179 --> 00:14:41,081
* And his name is

324
00:14:41,114 --> 00:14:47,354
* Aaaaa...

325
00:14:47,387 --> 00:14:50,523
* Adrian

326
00:14:50,557 --> 00:14:52,625
* Yeaaah

327
00:14:52,659 --> 00:14:55,996
* Adrian

328
00:14:56,029 --> 00:15:00,600
* I said oo-Aaaa...

329
00:15:00,633 --> 00:15:02,635
* Aaa-- *

330
00:15:02,669 --> 00:15:03,670
Mar--Marci.

331
00:15:03,703 --> 00:15:06,173
On second thought,

332
00:15:06,206 --> 00:15:08,475
why don't you tell me
about the case?

333
00:15:08,508 --> 00:15:11,044
Oh, okay.

334
00:15:12,212 --> 00:15:14,381
I'm sorry.
Can we start over?

335
00:15:14,414 --> 00:15:17,284
You had a dog.
His name was Otto.

336
00:15:17,317 --> 00:15:19,219
(Marci)
Yep, that's right.

337
00:15:19,252 --> 00:15:20,520
And Otto died last week?

338
00:15:20,553 --> 00:15:22,122
Monday, yeah.

339
00:15:22,155 --> 00:15:23,490
Well, I buried him
Monday night.

340
00:15:23,523 --> 00:15:28,128
So he's in the ground, dead.
Dead, dead dog.

341
00:15:28,161 --> 00:15:30,130
And then three days later,

342
00:15:30,163 --> 00:15:32,165
on Thursday,

343
00:15:32,199 --> 00:15:33,633
the woman across the street
was attacked?

344
00:15:33,666 --> 00:15:35,002
By--by a dog.

345
00:15:35,035 --> 00:15:37,104
Yeah, she was mauled.

346
00:15:37,137 --> 00:15:38,438
Isn't that the grossest word?

347
00:15:38,471 --> 00:15:40,340
"Mauled." Mauled.

348
00:15:40,373 --> 00:15:42,742
I mean, Otto had snapped
at her last year,

349
00:15:42,775 --> 00:15:44,144
but it wasn't a big deal.

350
00:15:44,177 --> 00:15:45,478
But of course,
you know,

351
00:15:45,512 --> 00:15:47,280
the cops naturally think
that he did it.

352
00:15:47,314 --> 00:15:50,150
So they dug him up
to compare the teeth marks.

353
00:15:50,183 --> 00:15:52,185
And they matched.

354
00:15:52,219 --> 00:15:53,553
Well, that's what they say.

355
00:15:53,586 --> 00:15:55,222
Yeah.

356
00:15:55,255 --> 00:15:56,423
They're gonna return him
tomorrow.

357
00:15:56,456 --> 00:15:58,458
I guess I'm gonna have
to bury him again.

358
00:15:58,491 --> 00:16:02,062
So to recap,
the dog dies on Monday,

359
00:16:02,095 --> 00:16:04,364
then three days later,
kills your neighbor.

360
00:16:04,397 --> 00:16:06,133
Pretty freaky, huh?

361
00:16:06,166 --> 00:16:09,302
And the dog was definitely dead
when you buried him.

362
00:16:09,336 --> 00:16:12,239
Yeah, the dog was definitely
dead when I buried him.

363
00:16:12,272 --> 00:16:13,640
What do you think,
I'm a nut?

364
00:16:13,673 --> 00:16:15,475
Ah...

365
00:16:15,508 --> 00:16:16,776
What do you think,
Adrian?

366
00:16:16,809 --> 00:16:18,211
I stopped thinking

367
00:16:18,245 --> 00:16:19,212
an hour and a half ago.

368
00:16:19,246 --> 00:16:20,380
What do you think?

369
00:16:20,413 --> 00:16:23,016
I think
we should call the captain.

370
00:16:23,050 --> 00:16:26,419
That's the men's room.

371
00:16:26,453 --> 00:16:28,088
And--
Hey.

372
00:16:28,121 --> 00:16:32,025
This...is my desk.

373
00:16:32,059 --> 00:16:34,094
Lieutenant Disher.

374
00:16:38,765 --> 00:16:42,302
Oh, check these out.

375
00:16:42,335 --> 00:16:45,338
Real handcuffs.
Wanna try 'em on?

376
00:16:49,076 --> 00:16:51,778
So...Sam.

377
00:16:51,811 --> 00:16:53,646
How long have you wanted
to be a policeman?

378
00:16:53,680 --> 00:16:55,748
I don't wanna be a cop.

379
00:16:55,782 --> 00:16:57,284
But your mom said you did.

380
00:16:57,317 --> 00:16:58,618
Maybe when I was nine.

381
00:16:58,651 --> 00:17:01,588
How old are you now?

382
00:17:01,621 --> 00:17:03,690
Nine and a half.

383
00:17:03,723 --> 00:17:05,625
Who'd want to be a cop?

384
00:17:05,658 --> 00:17:10,230
You don't make any money
and everybody hates you.

385
00:17:12,365 --> 00:17:15,068
[sighs]

386
00:17:15,102 --> 00:17:18,138
Okay.

387
00:17:18,171 --> 00:17:20,307
Okay, so, uh,
what do you wanna do?

388
00:17:20,340 --> 00:17:23,143
We got some game and stuff,
I think, for when kids visit.

389
00:17:23,176 --> 00:17:24,577
How about that?

390
00:17:24,611 --> 00:17:26,646
Let's see.

391
00:17:26,679 --> 00:17:28,648
No.

392
00:17:28,681 --> 00:17:30,283
Ah, yeah,
here we go.

393
00:17:30,317 --> 00:17:31,451
How about this?

394
00:17:31,484 --> 00:17:33,186
We got crayons.

395
00:17:33,220 --> 00:17:35,288
Coloring book.

396
00:17:37,757 --> 00:17:39,259
Hmm.
I did that one.

397
00:17:39,292 --> 00:17:41,294
I used to love this game.
Hm. Timber.

398
00:17:41,328 --> 00:17:43,196
Set it up.

399
00:17:45,265 --> 00:17:48,368
(Stottlemeyer)
I'm looking at the forensic
report right now, Monk.

400
00:17:48,401 --> 00:17:50,203
Your girlfriend's
in a lot of trouble.

401
00:17:50,237 --> 00:17:54,541
Yeah, she's--
she's not my girlfriend.

402
00:17:54,574 --> 00:17:57,310
Look, the bite marks
all match 100%.

403
00:17:57,344 --> 00:17:58,478
It's as good
as a fingerprint.

404
00:17:58,511 --> 00:18:00,547
She says the dog
was already dead.

405
00:18:00,580 --> 00:18:04,284
Debbie Ringel was attacked
by a dog.

406
00:18:04,317 --> 00:18:05,685
And it wasn't a ghost dog.

407
00:18:05,718 --> 00:18:07,487
Here is a more likely
scenario.

408
00:18:07,520 --> 00:18:09,856
The dog kills the neighbor,
Marci panics.

409
00:18:09,889 --> 00:18:11,858
She has her own dog put down

410
00:18:11,891 --> 00:18:14,294
and claims that he died
a couple of days earlier.

411
00:18:14,327 --> 00:18:16,463
I don't know.
I-I don't know.

412
00:18:16,496 --> 00:18:19,466
(Stottlemeyer)
Animal control warned her
about Cujo at least twice,

413
00:18:19,499 --> 00:18:21,134
which means
she's responsible.

414
00:18:21,168 --> 00:18:22,735
She could be indicted
for manslaughter.

415
00:18:22,769 --> 00:18:24,137
What she needs
is a good lawyer

416
00:18:24,171 --> 00:18:26,139
and you need
to get the hell out of there.

417
00:18:26,173 --> 00:18:27,307
Okay?
Bye-bye.

418
00:18:27,340 --> 00:18:29,309
Right.

419
00:18:29,342 --> 00:18:32,245
Natalie.

420
00:18:32,279 --> 00:18:33,280
[sighs]

421
00:18:33,313 --> 00:18:35,215
Not like that.

422
00:18:35,248 --> 00:18:37,417
Push it
with your fingertips.

423
00:18:37,450 --> 00:18:41,754
Now pull it
from the other side over here.

424
00:18:41,788 --> 00:18:43,823
Yeah, yeah.
All right.

425
00:18:43,856 --> 00:18:45,325
That's
how you do it.

426
00:18:45,358 --> 00:18:47,194
Having fun?
Yeah.

427
00:18:47,227 --> 00:18:49,196
You know.

428
00:18:49,229 --> 00:18:50,163
If you need me,

429
00:18:50,197 --> 00:18:52,299
I will be at the Four Seasons
with Linda.

430
00:18:52,332 --> 00:18:55,202
Do not need me.
She'll kill me.

431
00:18:55,235 --> 00:18:56,403
Okay, that's yours.

432
00:18:56,436 --> 00:18:57,504
Have fun.

433
00:18:57,537 --> 00:18:58,538
Oh, Captain?

434
00:18:58,571 --> 00:19:01,574
Have fun.

435
00:19:03,710 --> 00:19:05,945
Okay, I'm gonna go again.

436
00:19:05,978 --> 00:19:07,547
Push.

437
00:19:07,580 --> 00:19:09,582
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Okay.

438
00:19:09,616 --> 00:19:11,384
They think
I killed Otto?!

439
00:19:11,418 --> 00:19:13,720
Well, that would explain
quite a bit.
Makes a lotta sense.

440
00:19:13,753 --> 00:19:16,223
No, I-I don't do that,
okay?

441
00:19:16,256 --> 00:19:17,224
I don't kill things
I love.

442
00:19:17,257 --> 00:19:20,227
Well, that's reassuring.

443
00:19:20,260 --> 00:19:22,262
There must be
another explanation.

444
00:19:22,295 --> 00:19:23,963
Like what, Marci?

445
00:19:23,996 --> 00:19:25,932
Like, I don't know.
I mean, you do it all the time.

446
00:19:25,965 --> 00:19:28,601
The police have a theory
and they think it's cut and dry.

447
00:19:28,635 --> 00:19:30,937
And then you come in
and you do your thing.

448
00:19:30,970 --> 00:19:32,939
And you get clues
and you figure it out.

449
00:19:32,972 --> 00:19:35,875
You know, it's like "Mr. Monk
and the astronaut."

450
00:19:35,908 --> 00:19:37,777
Or "Mr. Monk goes back
to school."

451
00:19:37,810 --> 00:19:39,246
Oh, remember that one?

452
00:19:39,279 --> 00:19:40,046
No!

453
00:19:40,079 --> 00:19:41,147
Where are you getting
these names?

454
00:19:41,180 --> 00:19:43,550
Marci, according to the
forensic laboratory reports--

455
00:19:43,583 --> 00:19:44,884
Yeah, well,
they're wrong.

456
00:19:44,917 --> 00:19:47,554
Okay.
They can make mistakes.

457
00:19:47,587 --> 00:19:49,956
Maybe it was, uh, a frame-up.

458
00:19:49,989 --> 00:19:51,258
[laughing]

459
00:19:51,291 --> 00:19:52,892
They framed your dog?

460
00:19:52,925 --> 00:19:56,296
[imitating laughter]
Yeah, maybe they did
frame my dog, Natalie.

461
00:19:56,329 --> 00:19:58,398
It's not totally
unprecedented.

462
00:19:58,431 --> 00:20:00,400
What about "Mr. Monk
and the Panic Room"?

463
00:20:00,433 --> 00:20:03,270
They tried to frame a monkey,
didn't they?

464
00:20:03,303 --> 00:20:05,004
See, things aren't always
as they seem.

465
00:20:05,037 --> 00:20:07,440
That's true.
Okay.

466
00:20:07,474 --> 00:20:08,608
We made a deal.

467
00:20:08,641 --> 00:20:11,244
Okay.
I spent $800 for six hours.

468
00:20:11,278 --> 00:20:12,545
I own you.

469
00:20:12,579 --> 00:20:14,514
You have to do
what I say.

470
00:20:20,320 --> 00:20:21,854
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
What if he's home?

471
00:20:21,888 --> 00:20:23,756
There's no car
in the driveway.

472
00:20:23,790 --> 00:20:25,292
Worry wart.

473
00:20:25,325 --> 00:20:26,559
Adrian.

474
00:20:30,397 --> 00:20:31,698
You'll be the lookout.

475
00:20:31,731 --> 00:20:34,334
I'm not the lookout.

476
00:20:34,367 --> 00:20:37,236
That's where they found her--
in the shed.

477
00:20:38,738 --> 00:20:41,708
He's doing it.
That is so cool.

478
00:20:41,741 --> 00:20:43,710
I've got goose bumps.
I really do.

479
00:20:43,743 --> 00:20:45,312
You wanna see?
No, thank you.

480
00:20:45,345 --> 00:20:46,579
Bumpy.

481
00:20:46,613 --> 00:20:48,348
(Marci)
You have the best job
in the world.

482
00:20:48,381 --> 00:20:50,283
[muttering]
Not today, I don't.

483
00:20:50,317 --> 00:20:52,285
Did you say something?

484
00:20:52,319 --> 00:20:54,921
'Cause it sounded like
you said something.

485
00:21:34,927 --> 00:21:36,863
What?

486
00:21:36,896 --> 00:21:39,566
She was attacked right here.

487
00:21:39,599 --> 00:21:41,968
You can still see
the blood.

488
00:21:42,001 --> 00:21:45,004
But she must've tried
to fight back.

489
00:21:45,037 --> 00:21:46,806
Right?

490
00:21:46,839 --> 00:21:48,341
Look at all these tools.

491
00:21:48,375 --> 00:21:52,011
Why--why didn't she grab
one of these tools?

492
00:21:52,044 --> 00:21:53,079
[gasp]

493
00:21:53,112 --> 00:21:54,347
What are you doing?

494
00:21:54,381 --> 00:21:55,915
Clue hug!

495
00:21:55,948 --> 00:21:57,450
No!
Natalie!

496
00:21:57,484 --> 00:21:58,651
Marci!
Ooh, right.

497
00:21:58,685 --> 00:21:59,886
Yes, go!
Keep going.

498
00:21:59,919 --> 00:22:01,020
You're amazing.
You're amazing.

499
00:22:01,053 --> 00:22:03,590
Do your thing.

500
00:22:14,767 --> 00:22:16,903
(Natalie)
What is that?

501
00:22:16,936 --> 00:22:18,938
It's a flower petal.

502
00:22:20,840 --> 00:22:23,676
Tulip?

503
00:22:32,018 --> 00:22:34,120
There's no tulips
in this yard.

504
00:22:35,488 --> 00:22:38,458
That's not a clue.
That's just something I notice.

505
00:22:38,491 --> 00:22:40,092
This is what we call
an observation.

506
00:22:40,126 --> 00:22:42,128
Okay, right.

507
00:22:42,161 --> 00:22:45,698
Can I help you?

508
00:22:45,732 --> 00:22:47,434
Oh, it's you!

509
00:22:47,467 --> 00:22:49,168
Why can't you just
leave me alone?

510
00:22:49,201 --> 00:22:52,772
Mr. Ringel,
I'm very sorry for your loss.

511
00:22:52,805 --> 00:22:56,042
I wonder if I could ask you
a couple of questions.

512
00:22:56,075 --> 00:22:59,446
Did you actually see Marci's dog
on that day?

513
00:22:59,479 --> 00:23:00,980
We know it was her dog.

514
00:23:01,013 --> 00:23:02,515
He crawled in
under the fence.

515
00:23:02,549 --> 00:23:03,583
You can still see
the hole.

516
00:23:03,616 --> 00:23:06,052
I talked to the cops.
All the teeth marks match.

517
00:23:06,085 --> 00:23:08,855
And who the hell
are you?

518
00:23:08,888 --> 00:23:10,990
This is Adrian Monk,
okay?

519
00:23:11,023 --> 00:23:13,860
And he happens to be
a genius.

520
00:23:13,893 --> 00:23:15,194
Marci,
don't--don't--

521
00:23:15,227 --> 00:23:16,763
If you have anything
to hide--

522
00:23:16,796 --> 00:23:18,064
and I have a hunch
that you do--

523
00:23:18,097 --> 00:23:19,532
he's gonna find it.

524
00:23:19,566 --> 00:23:21,100
He's already found,
like, a million clues.

525
00:23:21,133 --> 00:23:22,034
Tell him.

526
00:23:22,068 --> 00:23:24,403
Okay, Marci,
let's just leave this man alone.

527
00:23:26,105 --> 00:23:27,974
You did it!
You killed her.

528
00:23:28,007 --> 00:23:30,109
You are in big trouble,
mister.

529
00:23:30,142 --> 00:23:35,181
Big trouble because Adrian Monk
always gets his man, friend!

530
00:23:35,214 --> 00:23:38,184
Sorry.
Sorry about her.

531
00:23:38,217 --> 00:23:40,953
Sorry about everything.
Sorry for your loss.

532
00:23:42,655 --> 00:23:45,725
So sorry.

533
00:23:45,758 --> 00:23:47,727
I-I did manage

534
00:23:47,760 --> 00:23:49,962
to get your tools all
straightened out, though.

535
00:23:51,631 --> 00:23:53,165
This hose is kind of a mess,
though.

536
00:23:53,199 --> 00:23:56,102
You might wanna--
it's okay.

537
00:24:01,908 --> 00:24:03,175
Natalie!

538
00:24:05,612 --> 00:24:08,648
He said Natalie!

539
00:24:14,587 --> 00:24:15,888
According to the police,

540
00:24:15,922 --> 00:24:19,526
Otto dug this hole,
attacked Mrs. Ringel,

541
00:24:19,559 --> 00:24:21,594
then got out the same way.

542
00:24:21,628 --> 00:24:23,062
So?

543
00:24:23,095 --> 00:24:25,832
Well, where's the dirt?
It's all on the other side.

544
00:24:25,865 --> 00:24:27,867
But that's the wrong side.

545
00:24:27,900 --> 00:24:31,070
When a dog digs a hole,
he pushes the dirt behind him.

546
00:24:31,103 --> 00:24:33,105
And...look!

547
00:24:36,676 --> 00:24:38,477
Dead...
Tulip.

548
00:24:42,582 --> 00:24:43,916
It's possible.

549
00:24:43,950 --> 00:24:48,154
There's a chance
she's not crazy.

550
00:24:48,187 --> 00:24:51,824
I mean, she's crazy,
but she might not be wrong.

551
00:24:55,327 --> 00:24:56,596
Clue hug?

552
00:24:56,629 --> 00:24:58,631
Take it like a man.

553
00:25:03,035 --> 00:25:05,738
Uh, I need a wipe,
Natalie.

554
00:25:05,772 --> 00:25:06,939
Ooh, ooh!

555
00:25:06,973 --> 00:25:08,174
Hold on!

556
00:25:08,207 --> 00:25:09,776
Right here.
Here.

557
00:25:09,809 --> 00:25:10,843
Oh, no!
Use mine.

558
00:25:10,877 --> 00:25:11,911
They're monogrammed.

559
00:25:11,944 --> 00:25:12,912
They're better.

560
00:25:12,945 --> 00:25:14,547
I-I did it myself.

561
00:25:14,581 --> 00:25:18,651
They're sanitary wipes.
Doesn't that defeat the purpose?

562
00:25:18,685 --> 00:25:21,988
Adrian, she's ruining
everything.

563
00:25:22,021 --> 00:25:23,122
I mean, who is she?

564
00:25:23,155 --> 00:25:26,125
I'm his assistant, okay?
I been with him for three years.

565
00:25:26,158 --> 00:25:28,695
Well, I've known him
even longer, okay?

566
00:25:28,728 --> 00:25:29,962
Okay, here's a little
news flash, Marci.

567
00:25:29,996 --> 00:25:31,798
Stalking someone
and knowing someone--

568
00:25:31,831 --> 00:25:33,132
two different things!

569
00:25:33,165 --> 00:25:34,233
Excuse me.

570
00:25:34,266 --> 00:25:36,035
Ladies,
let's settle down.

571
00:25:36,068 --> 00:25:39,205
I think we might have
an actual murder on our hands.

572
00:25:39,238 --> 00:25:40,840
Oh, woo-hoo!

573
00:25:40,873 --> 00:25:42,875
Exactly.
Woo-hoo.

574
00:25:42,909 --> 00:25:46,979
Let's just think
for a minute, okay?

575
00:25:47,013 --> 00:25:49,982
Tell me about the dog.
How did he die?

576
00:25:50,016 --> 00:25:51,684
Kidney failure.

577
00:25:51,718 --> 00:25:52,719
He went really quickly.

578
00:25:52,752 --> 00:25:55,855
Before he passed,
did anything unusual happen?

579
00:25:57,356 --> 00:25:59,826
Oh, yes!

580
00:25:59,859 --> 00:26:01,260
About two weeks ago,
he disappeared for a whole day.

581
00:26:01,293 --> 00:26:02,328
I couldn't find him.

582
00:26:02,361 --> 00:26:03,696
I was worried sick.

583
00:26:03,730 --> 00:26:04,864
I was putting up posters
everywhere.

584
00:26:04,897 --> 00:26:07,266
And then around 6:00,
he just showed up.

585
00:26:07,299 --> 00:26:10,169
And you have no idea
where he was?

586
00:26:10,202 --> 00:26:11,604
No.

587
00:26:11,638 --> 00:26:12,939
He was covered
in woodchips, though.

588
00:26:12,972 --> 00:26:14,140
Is that important?

589
00:26:14,173 --> 00:26:15,842
It took me an hour
to brush it out.

590
00:26:15,875 --> 00:26:16,809
You still have the brush?

591
00:26:16,843 --> 00:26:18,344
The brush?

592
00:26:18,377 --> 00:26:20,212
[exaggerated laughter]
Please.

593
00:26:20,246 --> 00:26:21,914
Actually,
that's a good idea.

594
00:26:21,948 --> 00:26:23,983
I'll get it.

595
00:26:33,225 --> 00:26:34,927
It's teak.

596
00:26:40,066 --> 00:26:42,101
Mahogany.

597
00:26:42,134 --> 00:26:43,870
Lumber yard.

598
00:26:43,903 --> 00:26:45,938
Oh, no.

599
00:26:45,972 --> 00:26:49,742
We have to now.
It's tradition.

600
00:27:00,419 --> 00:27:01,954
Can I help you?

601
00:27:01,988 --> 00:27:03,289
This is Adrian Monk.

602
00:27:03,322 --> 00:27:05,191
He's gonna be asking you
some questions.

603
00:27:05,224 --> 00:27:06,859
What about?

604
00:27:06,893 --> 00:27:07,960
You'll find out.

605
00:27:07,994 --> 00:27:09,128
First,
there are some ground rules.

606
00:27:09,161 --> 00:27:11,163
No coughing, no sneezing.
You will not shake his hand.

607
00:27:11,197 --> 00:27:13,365
You will not make small talk.
Do you understand?

608
00:27:13,399 --> 00:27:15,768
Lower that sleeve
so it's even with the other one.

609
00:27:15,802 --> 00:27:18,004
He's very particular.

610
00:27:26,312 --> 00:27:28,014
Yes.

611
00:27:31,217 --> 00:27:33,019
Have you seen this dog?

612
00:27:33,052 --> 00:27:34,821
No.

613
00:27:34,854 --> 00:27:37,824
Thank you.

614
00:27:37,857 --> 00:27:40,760
That is four lumber yards down,
one to go.

615
00:27:40,793 --> 00:27:41,961
How am I dong?

616
00:27:41,994 --> 00:27:43,863
Not bad, actually.

617
00:27:43,896 --> 00:27:45,431
Well, if you ever need
an assistant--

618
00:27:45,464 --> 00:27:46,999
Well, I have Natalie.

619
00:27:47,033 --> 00:27:48,801
Well, maybe it's time
for a change.

620
00:27:48,835 --> 00:27:50,369
Natalie and I have been together
for three and a half years.

621
00:27:50,402 --> 00:27:51,470
So I don't thi--

622
00:27:51,503 --> 00:27:53,339
I'll work for free.

623
00:27:57,176 --> 00:28:00,346
What?

624
00:28:00,379 --> 00:28:02,214
You're considering it?

625
00:28:02,248 --> 00:28:06,152
Well, you know...
free.

626
00:28:06,185 --> 00:28:08,187
So?

627
00:28:08,220 --> 00:28:10,790
You wanna make
a counter offer?

628
00:28:10,823 --> 00:28:13,159
Yeah, here's my counter offer.
I'm not nuts!

629
00:28:15,828 --> 00:28:17,363
You're right, you're right.
I'm sorry.

630
00:28:17,396 --> 00:28:18,898
It ju--
It's her!

631
00:28:18,931 --> 00:28:20,733
I get so flustered.

632
00:28:20,767 --> 00:28:22,434
Mr. Monk, you're not flustered.
You're flattered.

633
00:28:22,468 --> 00:28:23,870
Who wouldn't be?

634
00:28:23,903 --> 00:28:27,006
She adores you.
She knows everything about you.

635
00:28:27,039 --> 00:28:28,908
After all,
you're only human.

636
00:28:28,941 --> 00:28:31,210
There's no need
for name-calling.

637
00:28:31,243 --> 00:28:32,745
You know what?

638
00:28:32,779 --> 00:28:35,882
On second thought,
I think it's a great idea.

639
00:28:35,915 --> 00:28:37,516
What are you doing?
Calling a cab.

640
00:28:37,549 --> 00:28:38,851
I'm going home.
What?!

641
00:28:38,885 --> 00:28:40,419
I'm glad that this happened,
actually.

642
00:28:40,452 --> 00:28:42,521
That woman is as obsessive
and compulsive as you are.

643
00:28:42,554 --> 00:28:43,990
I want you to see
what it's like.

644
00:28:44,023 --> 00:28:44,991
Go ahead.

645
00:28:45,024 --> 00:28:46,458
Hang out with her,
work with her.

646
00:28:46,492 --> 00:28:48,294
I'll call you tomorrow.
We'll compare notes.

647
00:28:54,967 --> 00:28:58,337
It's for the best, boss.

648
00:28:58,370 --> 00:29:01,908
Last weekend was my fault.

649
00:29:01,941 --> 00:29:04,410
Hmm. And the weekend
before that?

650
00:29:04,443 --> 00:29:08,981
That one...
okay, that was my fault too.

651
00:29:09,015 --> 00:29:10,482
Mm-hmm.

652
00:29:10,516 --> 00:29:12,518
Look, I've got two detectives
on sick leave.

653
00:29:12,551 --> 00:29:13,786
I have been swamped.

654
00:29:13,820 --> 00:29:17,990
What does a girl have to do
to get your attention, Captain?

655
00:29:18,024 --> 00:29:19,758
Kill someone?

656
00:29:22,061 --> 00:29:23,896
[cell phone rings]

657
00:29:27,399 --> 00:29:29,368
I'm not gonna answer it.

658
00:29:29,401 --> 00:29:33,873
It is...in the briefcase.

659
00:29:35,074 --> 00:29:40,046
It's in the briefcase
and the briefcase is locked.

660
00:29:42,882 --> 00:29:46,018
Now...where were we?

661
00:29:46,052 --> 00:29:48,087
[laughing]

662
00:29:49,321 --> 00:29:51,423
[Disher whispering]
Okay.

663
00:29:51,457 --> 00:29:53,259
Fingertips.

664
00:29:53,292 --> 00:29:55,294
Lieutenant, we caught a break
on that Chinatown thing.

665
00:29:55,327 --> 00:29:58,364
Okay. Give it to Kramer.
Tell him I'm busy.

666
00:29:58,397 --> 00:29:59,999
I am Kramer.

667
00:30:00,032 --> 00:30:02,168
Uh-huh.

668
00:30:02,201 --> 00:30:03,469
Yeah.

669
00:30:17,616 --> 00:30:19,185
ding

670
00:30:26,025 --> 00:30:27,126
It's John Ringel.

671
00:30:27,159 --> 00:30:29,929
That's the guy.
That's the husband.

672
00:30:29,962 --> 00:30:33,265
Oh, yeah,
he owns a lumber yard.

673
00:30:33,299 --> 00:30:34,500
I forgot.

674
00:30:34,533 --> 00:30:35,868
You forgot?!

675
00:30:35,902 --> 00:30:37,003
How could you forget?!

676
00:30:37,036 --> 00:30:39,305
We've been checking
lumber yards all day!

677
00:30:39,338 --> 00:30:41,007
I'm sorry.
I wasn't thinking.

678
00:30:41,040 --> 00:30:44,944
I'm not a perfect person.

679
00:30:44,977 --> 00:30:46,345
I need a hug.

680
00:30:46,378 --> 00:30:48,948
No, no more hugs.

681
00:30:48,981 --> 00:30:51,450
Sorry,
I was just closing up.

682
00:30:51,483 --> 00:30:52,451
Not you again.

683
00:30:52,484 --> 00:30:54,253
My dog was here.

684
00:30:54,286 --> 00:30:56,488
You kidnapped my dog
two weeks ago!

685
00:30:56,522 --> 00:30:58,958
You really are certifiable,
aren't you?

686
00:30:58,991 --> 00:31:00,292
I told you
to stop harassing me.

687
00:31:00,326 --> 00:31:01,961
But that's it.

688
00:31:01,994 --> 00:31:03,996
I'm gonna call my lawyer
and then I'm calling the cops.

689
00:31:09,635 --> 00:31:13,272
Let's just get outta here.

690
00:31:13,305 --> 00:31:14,974
I think he's bluffing.

691
00:31:15,007 --> 00:31:16,375
He's bluffing.

692
00:31:19,211 --> 00:31:20,312
What is it?

693
00:31:23,482 --> 00:31:25,384
It's chew marks.

694
00:31:28,187 --> 00:31:29,221
Look!

695
00:31:30,222 --> 00:31:31,490
[gasp]

696
00:31:31,523 --> 00:31:32,891
Otto!

697
00:31:34,093 --> 00:31:35,928
You are amazing!

698
00:31:35,962 --> 00:31:37,696
What do you wanna call
this case?

699
00:31:37,729 --> 00:31:39,465
I don't know!
Shut up.

700
00:31:39,498 --> 00:31:41,533
How about
"Mr. Monk is Friggin' Awesome"?

701
00:31:41,567 --> 00:31:44,236
How about "Mr. Monk and Marci:
The Adventure Begins"?

702
00:31:44,270 --> 00:31:47,239
It doesn't matter.
Nobody cares about the name.

703
00:31:47,273 --> 00:31:49,541
Just shut it.

704
00:31:54,380 --> 00:31:55,982
Monogrammed wipe.

705
00:32:04,723 --> 00:32:08,995
"Plaster mold.
Do not ingest."

706
00:32:13,032 --> 00:32:18,204
Marci, when Otto died,
did you tell anyone?

707
00:32:18,237 --> 00:32:21,373
No.

708
00:32:24,510 --> 00:32:26,412
[whispering]
Oh, my God.

709
00:32:26,445 --> 00:32:28,981
Don't turn!
Don't--don't--don't turn around.

710
00:32:30,782 --> 00:32:33,752
I think you were right.

711
00:32:33,785 --> 00:32:35,421
He's the guy.
[squealing]

712
00:32:35,454 --> 00:32:38,057
And I know
how he did it.

713
00:32:38,090 --> 00:32:38,757
Oh, my gosh.

714
00:32:38,790 --> 00:32:40,159
Say, "Here's what happened."

715
00:32:40,192 --> 00:32:42,728
He must've been
planning this for weeks!

716
00:32:42,761 --> 00:32:44,396
Say, "Here's what happened"!

717
00:32:44,430 --> 00:32:45,731
Shh.

718
00:32:45,764 --> 00:32:47,433
Here's what happened.

719
00:32:49,201 --> 00:32:52,604
John Ringel realized
he could murder his wife

720
00:32:52,638 --> 00:32:54,273
and blame it
on your dog.

721
00:32:54,306 --> 00:32:56,075
Nobody would ever question it.

722
00:32:56,108 --> 00:32:58,710
Everybody knew
Otto was a little wild.

723
00:32:58,744 --> 00:33:00,546
[Marci squeals]

724
00:33:00,579 --> 00:33:01,780
Marci, what are you doing?

725
00:33:01,813 --> 00:33:03,549
There's no hugging during
the "Here's what happened."

726
00:33:03,582 --> 00:33:04,350
(Marci)
Sorry, go on.

727
00:33:04,383 --> 00:33:05,984
(Monk)
Just stand over there.

728
00:33:07,719 --> 00:33:09,355
That day
Otto disappeared

729
00:33:09,388 --> 00:33:12,691
Ringel must've
brought him here, drugged him,

730
00:33:12,724 --> 00:33:16,095
and made an impression
of his teeth.

731
00:33:16,128 --> 00:33:18,464
(Marci)
Oh, poor Otto!

732
00:33:24,503 --> 00:33:26,238
(Monk)
Then Ringel built
a lethal weapon

733
00:33:26,272 --> 00:33:28,574
using the mold
of Otto's teeth.

734
00:33:28,607 --> 00:33:30,676
It couldn't have been
too hard.

735
00:33:30,709 --> 00:33:32,444
After all,
he owns a lumber yard.

736
00:33:32,478 --> 00:33:34,380
He had all the equipment
he needed.

737
00:33:37,749 --> 00:33:40,052
[clanking]

738
00:33:41,787 --> 00:33:44,323
Then he waited.

739
00:33:44,356 --> 00:33:46,192
He was in no rush.

740
00:33:46,225 --> 00:33:48,760
One week, two weeks,

741
00:33:48,794 --> 00:33:51,463
until finally,
she was alone.

742
00:33:57,503 --> 00:34:00,706
He knew the bite marks
would match up perfectly.

743
00:34:00,739 --> 00:34:03,509
The cops--everyone--
would assume it was your dog.

744
00:34:03,542 --> 00:34:07,779
It was a perfect crime,
except for one thing.

745
00:34:09,481 --> 00:34:11,417
He had waited too long.

746
00:34:11,450 --> 00:34:14,353
He didn't know that Otto
had died three days earlier.

747
00:34:14,386 --> 00:34:16,155
He was framing a dead dog!

748
00:34:16,188 --> 00:34:19,625
Wow.

749
00:34:19,658 --> 00:34:22,228
That is incredible!

750
00:34:22,261 --> 00:34:23,729
Where did he go?

751
00:34:23,762 --> 00:34:25,797
(Marci)
Do it one more time
for the website.

752
00:34:25,831 --> 00:34:27,799
What are you doing?!
I'm not gonna say it again.

753
00:34:27,833 --> 00:34:29,401
You don't have to do
the whole thing.

754
00:34:29,435 --> 00:34:31,370
Just say how you know
how he killed his wife.

755
00:34:31,403 --> 00:34:32,804
Marci, would you keep
your voice down?

756
00:34:32,838 --> 00:34:34,873
He's gonna hear us.

757
00:34:34,906 --> 00:34:36,775
Too late.

758
00:34:36,808 --> 00:34:39,811
I already heard ya.

759
00:34:46,152 --> 00:34:50,156
Shut up and don't move.

760
00:34:50,189 --> 00:34:51,257
Shoot him.

761
00:34:51,290 --> 00:34:53,192
I don't have a gun.

762
00:34:53,225 --> 00:34:55,161
You did in "Mr. Monk
and The Dragon's Lair."

763
00:34:55,194 --> 00:34:57,296
The what?!

764
00:34:57,329 --> 00:34:58,630
Oh, wait.
I made that one up.

765
00:34:58,664 --> 00:35:00,732
It's called "fan fiction."

766
00:35:00,766 --> 00:35:01,833
I said...

767
00:35:01,867 --> 00:35:03,635
shut up!

768
00:35:03,669 --> 00:35:06,205
Agh!
Son of a bitch!

769
00:35:13,345 --> 00:35:15,281
Mm.

770
00:35:20,319 --> 00:35:21,753
What is it?

771
00:35:21,787 --> 00:35:26,258
Leland,
this is not very romantic.

772
00:35:26,292 --> 00:35:29,161
What are you looking at?

773
00:35:29,195 --> 00:35:30,662
Bite marks.

774
00:35:30,696 --> 00:35:33,765
I'm afraid to ask.

775
00:35:35,467 --> 00:35:37,836
Look at the bite marks.

776
00:35:37,869 --> 00:35:40,506
That woman was...
attacked by a dog.

777
00:35:40,539 --> 00:35:41,907
Look at the bite marks.

778
00:35:41,940 --> 00:35:43,642
No, thank you.

779
00:35:43,675 --> 00:35:46,378
They're all upside down.

780
00:35:46,412 --> 00:35:49,248
Even the defensive ones.

781
00:35:50,716 --> 00:35:54,686
Um...

782
00:35:54,720 --> 00:35:56,555
I gotta make
a phone call.

783
00:35:59,958 --> 00:36:04,730
[phone ringing]

784
00:36:04,763 --> 00:36:06,498
Mr. Monk?

785
00:36:06,532 --> 00:36:08,867
(Stottlemeyer)
No, it's me.
I'm trying to find him.

786
00:36:08,900 --> 00:36:11,803
[phone ringing]

787
00:36:18,510 --> 00:36:19,978
Disher.

788
00:36:20,011 --> 00:36:21,947
(Stottlemeyer)
Randy, meet me
at 420 Vinton Street.

789
00:36:21,980 --> 00:36:24,316
It's a lumber yard.
It's owned by John Ringel.

790
00:36:24,350 --> 00:36:25,584
Chop chop.

791
00:36:25,617 --> 00:36:26,885
Who's John Ringel?

792
00:36:26,918 --> 00:36:28,687
As of ten minutes ago,
he's a murder suspect.

793
00:36:28,720 --> 00:36:30,889
Monk is there now.
I think he might be in trouble.

794
00:36:30,922 --> 00:36:32,524
I'm on my way.

795
00:36:34,926 --> 00:36:37,963
You still playing
that stupid game?

796
00:36:37,996 --> 00:36:38,930
Randy?

797
00:36:38,964 --> 00:36:41,867
Randy?

798
00:36:41,900 --> 00:36:43,402
No.

799
00:37:00,686 --> 00:37:01,820
[gasps]

800
00:37:01,853 --> 00:37:03,989
What is this?

801
00:37:04,022 --> 00:37:04,956
Is this blood?

802
00:37:04,990 --> 00:37:06,292
Shh.

803
00:37:06,325 --> 00:37:07,426
You've been shot.

804
00:37:07,459 --> 00:37:08,727
Oh, my God!
I've been shot!

805
00:37:08,760 --> 00:37:09,861
Shh.
It's okay.

806
00:37:09,895 --> 00:37:10,962
It's just a scratch.

807
00:37:10,996 --> 00:37:12,298
What am I doing here?

808
00:37:12,331 --> 00:37:13,632
Shut--shut up.

809
00:37:13,665 --> 00:37:15,601
This isn't fun anymore.
Why did you bring me here?

810
00:37:15,634 --> 00:37:17,269
I didn't bring you here!

811
00:37:17,303 --> 00:37:19,671
I don't wanna do this.
I hate this.

812
00:37:19,705 --> 00:37:21,873
Excuse me.
Pause.

813
00:37:21,907 --> 00:37:23,609
Pause, please.

814
00:37:23,642 --> 00:37:26,512
If we could just
put a pause on this...

815
00:37:26,545 --> 00:37:27,879
for a second.

816
00:37:27,913 --> 00:37:29,548
I wanna go home.

817
00:37:29,581 --> 00:37:31,283
And I know,

818
00:37:31,317 --> 00:37:33,018
but I am absolutely
not gonna say anything

819
00:37:33,051 --> 00:37:34,686
about you killing
your wife.

820
00:37:34,720 --> 00:37:36,522
It's no biggie.

821
00:37:36,555 --> 00:37:38,390
I mean,
she was asking for it.

822
00:37:38,424 --> 00:37:39,991
I've seen her out there.
I'm your neighbor.

823
00:37:40,025 --> 00:37:41,993
I've seen her in the garden
with her flower pot

824
00:37:42,027 --> 00:37:46,932
going blah, blah, blah.
My gardenias are awesome.

825
00:37:46,965 --> 00:37:48,434
So I'm just gonna go.

826
00:37:48,467 --> 00:37:52,438
Yeah,
I don't think so!

827
00:37:52,471 --> 00:37:54,306
Monk!

828
00:37:54,340 --> 00:37:55,441
Come on out!

829
00:37:55,474 --> 00:37:56,842
I have your girlfriend!

830
00:37:56,875 --> 00:37:59,978
I'm not his girlfriend.
I don't even like him anymore.

831
00:38:02,047 --> 00:38:04,516
Monk?

832
00:38:04,550 --> 00:38:07,953
Come out or I'll kill her.

833
00:38:07,986 --> 00:38:08,987
Okay, right here.

834
00:38:18,364 --> 00:38:20,832
Natalie, stay back.

835
00:38:36,948 --> 00:38:38,450
(Ringel)
Where's your car, Marci?

836
00:38:38,484 --> 00:38:39,685
Out front.

837
00:38:39,718 --> 00:38:42,721
I hope you have
a full tank.

838
00:38:42,754 --> 00:38:43,989
We got a long trip
ahead of us.

839
00:38:44,022 --> 00:38:45,090
Listen.
I have to sit in the front.

840
00:38:45,123 --> 00:38:46,625
It's one of my things.

841
00:38:46,658 --> 00:38:48,059
Yeah,
he's got a million "things."

842
00:38:48,093 --> 00:38:51,897
I don't know
what I was thinking.

843
00:38:51,930 --> 00:38:52,998
SFPD!
Drop the weapon!

844
00:38:53,031 --> 00:38:55,567
[gunshots]

845
00:38:58,537 --> 00:38:59,971
Go, go, go!

846
00:39:00,005 --> 00:39:01,973
Go, go, go, go!

847
00:39:03,642 --> 00:39:05,110
Where is he?

848
00:39:05,143 --> 00:39:07,145
I can't get a shot.

849
00:39:07,178 --> 00:39:08,547
Go around.

850
00:39:08,580 --> 00:39:10,449
Go around!

851
00:39:41,647 --> 00:39:43,114
What are you doing?

852
00:39:53,959 --> 00:39:55,861
whack!
Oh!

853
00:40:03,001 --> 00:40:04,703
Let me see your hands!

854
00:40:04,736 --> 00:40:06,438
Let's see 'em.

855
00:40:18,083 --> 00:40:21,086
Stupid game, huh?

856
00:40:26,224 --> 00:40:27,192
(Natalie)
What is it?

857
00:40:27,225 --> 00:40:31,162
Oh, it's--
it's from Marci.

858
00:40:31,196 --> 00:40:32,764
"Adrian, I'm sorry.

859
00:40:32,798 --> 00:40:34,766
"I can't have your things
in my house anymore.

860
00:40:34,800 --> 00:40:38,069
"How would I ever explain them
to Fff-Murray Abraham?

861
00:40:38,103 --> 00:40:40,171
F. Murray Abraham.
The actor.

862
00:40:40,205 --> 00:40:43,475
May God have mercy
on his soul.

863
00:40:43,509 --> 00:40:45,544
Your pants are back.

864
00:40:45,577 --> 00:40:48,179
I'd already
thrown this stuff out.

865
00:40:48,213 --> 00:40:49,848
Oh, hey. Look.

866
00:40:49,881 --> 00:40:51,717
It's you.

867
00:40:51,750 --> 00:40:54,486
[imitating Marci]
Oh, Adrian, I adore you.
Aren't you amazing?

868
00:40:54,520 --> 00:40:56,154
I love everything you say
and do.

869
00:40:56,187 --> 00:40:58,256
All right.
It wasn't like that.

870
00:40:58,289 --> 00:40:59,725
Thank you, Marci.

871
00:40:59,758 --> 00:41:01,059
I think
you have excellent taste.

872
00:41:01,092 --> 00:41:02,861
How would you like to be
my new assistant?

873
00:41:02,894 --> 00:41:04,796
You could follow me around
and worship me all day.

874
00:41:04,830 --> 00:41:06,765
Cut it out, will you?
And let's seal the deal

875
00:41:06,798 --> 00:41:08,534
with a great big clue hug.

876
00:41:08,567 --> 00:41:09,968
Clue hug!
Clue hug!

877
00:41:10,001 --> 00:41:11,637
Clue hug!
Stop it.

878
00:41:11,670 --> 00:41:13,605
Oh, I love you.
I'm your biggest fan.

879
00:41:13,639 --> 00:41:15,073
I just want
a little clue hug!

880
00:41:15,106 --> 00:41:16,675
Natalie, cut it out.
I know it's you.

881
00:41:16,708 --> 00:41:18,944
Clue hug, clue hug.

882
00:41:18,977 --> 00:41:21,980
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